Welcome to Furday Friday!! Today, you have a very serious duty ahead, to mediate the high profile case of Snarkygirl vs. Guinness the Bernese in case #u28j3901 “THE CASE OF THE APARTMENT SECURITY DEPOSIT”
Opening Statements, Snarkygirl, you may begin:
“As you all know, Will and I have been going through some financial distress recently and we are currently looking to relocate to a more cost-effective domicile. When we moved into this apartment, we were careful to explain in excruciating detail to the animals what we called the “No Property Damage” clause in their lease with us. We explained that they could live with us, free of charge, and we would provide them with food, water, treats, timed restroom breaks, exercise, “working” vacations, and all the love they could stand in exchange for unconditional love and they had to be my photography subjects 24/7. According to the terms of their contract, Will and I would pay the PET FEE to the apartment complex on their behalf with the understanding that they were not to cause ANY physical damage to the apartment what-so-ever. As you will clearly see by the documented evidence, they have broken that contract. What we are asking for here is simple justice.”
Opening Statements, Guinness:
“BARK”
Moving On. As you all may or may not know, Guinness has always been kind of a strange, yet lovable dog who manages to scuff up the walls, scratch up the furniture, and squeeze himself into the strangest spots to sleep. So, I present to you, the jury (or readers, whatever), documented evidenceof how the apartment walls, coffee table, and couch trim have all become victims to this incredibly adorable dog and his vicious sleeping habits.
Exhibits A, B, and C:
Guinness sleeping as a puppy. This is where the problems started:
In Exhibit D, you can see that, he has now decided to move his torment to the furniture as well as the walls:
And in Exhibit E, you can see that his behavior is starting to influence the other animals as well:
When will the torment end?!?!
So, in the pursuit of justice, I ask you, the jury to find the defendant GUILTY of being incredibly cute and destructive to property. The Plaintiff, Snarkygirl, is asking for punitive damages for breaking their contract and the damage to the apartment and furniture in the amount of 50 milkbones.
You now have a very serious decision in front of you, and I ask that you don’t make that decision light-heartedly. Please consider all sides of the case you heard here today and base your decision accordingly. Remember, these are MILKBONES We’re talking about, not just any run of the mill dog treat. Please give this case the consideration it deserves. You may leave your judgments in the comments.
In other news, the cat has taken up residence under the new dog bowl:
Snarkygirl08's Weblog 
goodbadandugly2 said,
October 24, 2008 at 1:52 pm
My dog, Patches sleeps the very same way! OMG this cracked me up! 🙂
Thanks for the laugh….I needed it!
My future is so bright « Snarkygirl08’s Weblog said,
October 29, 2008 at 2:14 pm
[…] one of the many things I have stuck on their heads and photographed this week as part of their payment to me. Stay tuned for more later in the week. […]